Soul Parenting

I don’t parent by any book, method or movement. I’ve read books but have never fully aligned myself to the self-settling or attachment parenting crew. I like to think that there is no such thing as perfect parenting, or the perfect baby. We all have our moments. I’d settle for the 80/20 rule of life. 80% of the time, I’m the parent I want to be – I’m chilled, happy and loving my babies. 20% of the time, I shout, I’m crazed and they drive me up the wall.

Dear Julian and Leo,

I am a mother of contradictions and I’ll never, always, get it right. I’m going to make mistakes and I’m going to do my best to work out a better way next time. You are going to love me, hate me, cling to me, be embarrassed by me and there is not a damn thing I can do to stop it, for there is no such thing as a perfect parent. Too much love and leniency and you’ll walk all over me, too much control and you won’t become the person you’re destined to be.

I am going to be your mother, adversary, champion, enemy and greatest advisor. I am going to do what you want and do what you don’t want. It will be up to me, and you, and our given moods of the day, week, month, year.

This is my greatest job and all you need to know is that I will love you, always, no matter how our relationship unfolds.

Leo if I don’t rock you to sleep, it’s because I’m tired, I’m busy or I just can’t. If you’re hungry and don’t get fed immediately, it’s because I missed the cue, forgot the time or I’m busy. I will always get there eventually and when I do I will bring food, cuddles and love.

Jules,  the list for your birthday is getting exhaustive. The excuses you use for not going to bed are endless. Today, your tantrums have been unprovoked and unacceptable. But when you are good…you are very, very good and I love you, every facet of you.

You are my greatest creation and all the more for the fact I can’t control you both, you are your own people. Everyday leaves me in stitches, in awe and in love.



  1. You summed that up superbly! Here here. You are not alone. I empathise with everything you write. You are a wonderful mother and even more wonderful that you recognise that no one is perfect, not babies nor parents… but hey, “what is perfect?”… we love them, more than life itself and I think at the end of the day, that’s what make this life so special and “perfect”.

  2. beautiful hon but your dad says there is such a thing as a perfect parent , namely him , mmmmmm no comment xx

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