Perception is Reality

Today’s Mantra: …If I had thought of a positive one to change my thinking maybe my day wouldn’t have been so bad 🙂

Yesterday was a day I just want to forget.

Life had no sparkle. No fun. No joy.

Exhausted I functioned, got through the day and went to bed when I finally got Leo down. Not one iota of time for myself.

I had big plans for the day, I had a couple of projects I wanted to work on and I’d declared it a pyjama day. No pressure to get anyone dressed. No rush to be anywhere at all.

Time frittered away and so did my mood. It was black by midday.

Leo was clingy and whingy from the moment he got up from his 30 minute naps till the time I struggled to put him down again. I carried him around on my over-used hip, my back calling out for a break, some exercise or a massage.

In a moment where the clouds parted to reveal the sun, Leo started babbling, then clearly saying da da da. Chuffed I’d caught it on my phone, I eagerly went to look at the recording to send on to my husband. Memory full…did not record.

Of course.

Julian, the poor boy, was fine and pretty well behaved but I snapped my way through most of the day and he didn’t get much leeway.

My family came over for dinner (bringing the dinner) and that was a sagging relief. The kids were handed over and my arms got a much needed break. Unfortunately Leo’s eyes were wide open when they left and as my husband is hobbling around right now (basketball injury) I’m the one that gets to put the kids to bed.

By the time Julian was down and I went to claim Leo off Daniel, he was asleep. Thank God.

For the next ten minutes I was free.

And then he woke up.

He was crying and by the time I started walking down the hall to get him he stopped. It was 8:30pm. I didn’t hear from him again till 3:00am. Unheard of!

Unfortunately I was expecting him to wake and so ingrained in broken sleep that I woke up hourly…and checked on him at 12:30 and 1:30pm. His sweet little voice was croaky when he did wake up, obviously that’s why he’d been so out of sorts all day.

All I can say is that he better not be getting a full blown illness that will put off the grommet surgery…

That’s all that’s getting me through at the moment.

Two more nights.




  1. I can so relate to sleeping with one eye open waiting for the baby to wake up…sometimes it’s more punishing than when they do actually wake up!

  2. aw my darling, u sound at the end of your tether! fingers crossed all will be well, my prayers are with you xxx

Leave a Reply