It’s about this time last week that I F-bombed my child.
Watching him happily swimming this week I had to wonder – who’s problem was it that he didn’t want to get into the pool?
From his point of view:
Ready for swimming – nope we gotta wait, Nanna’s not here yet.
For some reason Mum’s not bringing Leo. Nanna’s still not here.
Mum’s a little bit hypo about it. She’s freaking me out.
Ok Leo is now in the car. Nope we’ve stopped; there’s Nanna’s car. There goes Leo.
Now we are racing to swimming. She’s dragging me. That’s not cool. Not sure about this anymore. It’s kinda cold.
Nah Mum, it’s not happening today. Why are you screaming at me? I’m not feeling like it today. Why do I have to? You are freaking me out. Great now I’ve lost my DVD privileges. There goes the trip to Nannas. I still don’t want to get in though. Oh well.
Meanwhile I’ve given up on the $17 for the lesson. Plus the rest of the lessons. That’s $170 he’s cost me now. He’s obviously never swimming again so now he’s going to be the child that can’t swim. He’ll probably get teased.
“Get in the pool Julian!”
No he still won’t go. How do I make him bend to my will? His whole future is going down in flames….right here….right now.
People trip themselves up like this all the time.
How many times have you stressed over money? Obsessed about not having enough – feel physically sick? Only to have it turn out fine or at least find some kind of solution?
Ever given up your whole healthy eating regime because of a guilt-laden chocolate bar? You’ve tripped into the future and obviously failed, you’ve got no willpower and won’t be able to stick to it.
So what’s the solution?
Stay in the present.
It takes practice. It takes patience. It takes courage.
Last night I was watching the prelude videos to the Hay House Summit and Louise Hay mentioned that all problems can be solved by learning to love yourself. She says that in childhood we hear “NO.” “Stop”. “Don’t do That.” “That’s wrong.” so much that we end up growing up not knowing who we are.
But how do we not do this to our children Louise? What is the solution?
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this.
Are parents too busy future tripping that we are not worried about our children being themselves? Do we just want them to be on the path to good swimming, good manners, a prosperous future?
I haven’t got he answers for you but I will be tying to be more mindful. Today. Right now.